Archive for the ‘Talking about myself again’ Category

I love the Fourth of July… I feel like it is one of those holidays that has always meant so much to me, especially being from Boston where the celebration is weekend-long event.

One of the best parts of any holiday, especially the 4th of July, is getting to see my family. I not only get some beach time with a few fine ladies, but I get to see my Dad and his family as well as my cousins and Tias/Tios (aunt and uncles in Portuguese) on my Dad’s side. (There is nothing more entertaining than surrounding yourself with a whole bunch of Portuguese family members, FYI)

Another favorite part of the 4th of July is of course, the food. From cheeseburgers off the grill, pasta & potato salad, and fresh fruit – it seems that everything I eat the whole 4 day weekend just tastes that much better. The adult beverages are also that much more delicious

But my all time favorite 4th of July food item? Watermelon. Hands Down. It is so freaking good around this time that I have been eating about a watermelon to the face every other day… yea – straight addicted.

So far this weekend, I have a beach day and bbq under my belt – and I have another bbq at my Daddy’s house on the 4th. Sadly, I will be watching the fireworks from afar this year. Tommy has to work so we won’t be taking the walk to the Cambridge bridge to catch the fireworks display at the Esplanade. Kind of a bummer, but I am just thankful that I get to spend some time with Tommy on the actual 4th of July, as he has been working a lot. I have defintely been missing him lately…


And of course, the 4th is like the real start of Summer around these parts. I am excited for more summer fun and the hotter days to come… but for now I am going to enjoy the 4th with those that I love. and stuff my face with copious amounts of watermelon and alcohol

Happy 4th of July!!


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The other night I was channel surfing and came across the movie, Mean Girls. The movie depicts female, high school social cliques and the brutality and cattiness of the “mean” (aka popular) girls. The movie plot got me thinking about that cattiness that doesn’t end in high school but only just begins, and how women seem to be life-long members of cattiness club. Stupid movie as it may be, it got me thinking about why women are so catty towards each other…

Lately I am beginning to think that it is actually in our nature to be bitches. I mean, it has to be right? Women are the only creatures that instantaneously hate another woman without even knowing a thing about her — only judging her for how she looks and what she has.  I don’t think there is one woman out there who can claim that she has never made a snap fashion judgement to herself (“What is she wearing!) or worse said it out loud. I am included in this group so don’t think I am going all “high and mighty” here. Because I am not. I have definitely taken place in girl on girl hate before (especially in high school), and have only recently started to be more aware of these bitchy auto-thoughts. Perhaps it was four years ago, when a teenager entered my life and I saw how girls were through her eyes. Or maybe it is that I am just growing up. Regardless of the reason, I definitely make it point to be aware of the things I think and say; and therefore try to correct myself if I find myself drinking the haterade.

I had a nice dose of girl on girl hate last year by supposed close friends and more recently by a woman who I didn’t know from a hole in the wall at a bar a couple weekends ago. Since then I came up with my own list on why *I* think woman are catty (this is only my opinion so please take it with a grain of salt as I could be full of shit crap)



Why bitches be bitches:

1) Women are jealous. Plain and simple. They are so jealous of other women and what they have that they can barely stand themselves. This is where the cattiness comes in. To counteract the fact that they can’t stand themselves, they must try and bring other woman down to their level.

2) Women feel insecure about themselves; therefore make themselves feel better by believing others are more flawed than them. Envy monsters with low self-esteem like pointing out the flaws of others to lessen their feelings of inferiority; and increases false feelings of superiority. Women feel superior to other women if they believe they are physically more attractive.

3) Women are competitive. They compete with themselves and compete with other woman on every level possible (personal, societal etc). Envy monsters usually have a warped view of the world; and think that if a woman has something she envies and wants (mate, job, family, life) – her chances of getting that same thing are lessened. (you know, because the world is such a small and all)


Like I said earlier, I am not preaching on a soap box by any means. I guess I just feel that the cattiness we are all too familiar with is unnecessary. I think that hating on anyone is just plain exhausting and not worth it to me. In this life, there is always going to be someone is who is prettier than me, skinnier, richer, has a better wardrobe etc and I am OK with that. Live and let live, right?



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How is it Sunday night already? I feel like this weekend completely flew by, probably because it was a weekend full of friends and fun. But aren’t those the best kind of weekends? Last night, we headed out to a birthday party that was also a pig roast. Yep, a pig roast.

At first, I was a little hesitant of said pig roast. I have only been to one other one, and that was years ago in Puerto Rico and it was a bit more of cultural experience than anything. Last night, however, it was not cultural. It was to eat! (I did not partake the eating of the animal and not because I am a vegetarian or anything – I am not)

Regardless of the roasting, it still was quite a fun night. There were two fires going (and thank goodness there was because it was seriously freezing! It is the middle of May and I had 2 coats on, gloves, and my scarf! I really hope it warms up soon…) with great friends and good conversation all around.


Then today we had a wedding to attend. Our neighbors, who are in their 60’s, decided to go before their friends and family and tie the knot! I thought it was so cute when that they decided to marry, regardless of their age and sadly failing health, and was touched to be a part of their special day.

It was so refreshing to see these two people so in love. Lately, all I hear in regards to marriage is how the divorce rate is rising and marriage as we know it isn’t working for a lot of people. Even in my personal life, being with someone who has been married before, many conversations about marriage and love have taken place. Seeing these two people so in love and devoted to each other, and taking their vows in their church was quite heartwarming.

It also got me thinking about why marriage today is not working for so many couples out there? Is it pressures from other aspects of their lives like financial or is it personal – like more and more couples are just ‘growing‘ and therefore lives are taking different paths. Personally, I don’t think people try hard enough to save their marriages. I know this is a bold statement – and just my opinion- but I feel like our society is so quick to give up on something that proves difficult or not easy as pie. Regardless of the reasons, it saddens me… Hopefully love and marriage will once again prevail.


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So, I am the epitome of routine. I have certain things that I like and I am comfortable with, and usually don’t stray too far from my “norm”. And although I am ok with this fact, sometimes I realize that I miss out on new experiences because I am so set in my little box. This is definitely relevant in terms of exercising. I usually do the same old thing every. single. day. – cardio and lifting machines. I realize this is most people’s worst nightmare – doing the same thing every day – but that isn’t what is bothering me…

What’s bothering me you ask about my standby routine? The fact that I want to try new things, but me being a bit shy is holding me back. Specifically, group exercise classes. I have belonged to about 4 gyms and all of them offered group classes. I always told myself I would go and check out the classes, but alas I never did. I always made up some excuse, but the truth is … I was scared. And I still am. I really want to check out some of the classes that my gym, LA Fitness, has including Zumba and Spin, but I am afraid that 1) I won’t know what I am doing and 2) will make a fool out of myself. Of course, it doesn’t help that I don’t know anyone at my gym either.

I know, I know. Sound the lame bell but this is something that I really want to work on – for myself. So since it is Sunday, I figured I would post some goals of mine, since I love lists and all…

Weekly Mini Goals:

1) Attend at least one group exercise class at the gym!

2) Take care of some “personal housekeeping” (ie errands) that I have been completely blowing off…

3) Plant something outside…

That last one may seem a bit odd, but I am trying to broaden my horizons here people!

Any suggestions on getting over my fear of group classes?


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I seemed to be stuck in a summer daydream today! I think that the not-so-like May weather is to blame. Usually May is beautiful here in Boston, but for some reason the April showers seem to be hovering. Every time I check the weather on my phone, there seems to be a chance of rain every. single. day. Gah! I am getting very impatient and I really just want summer to get here – and quick!

So while I wait for warmer weather to make an appearance, I been keeping myself busy shopping for Summer instead. Unfortunately, I am not too fashion savvy, but I have found a  few things that I absolutely love:

1) Flip Flops! Lots and lots of flip flops! Even though I already have way too many pairs, I have seen some super cute flip flops that I just had to have… and bonus: they were BOGO at Payless. Score!

2) Swim Suits – Another summer item that I may have a slight hoarder issue with. I have a lot of bathing suits. Like a real lot. I have 2 drawers that are completely devoted to storing my suits, and still not all of them fit. Regardless of this fact, I still had to grab a few new ones for this summer. One place that swimsuit dreams come true? Victoria’s Secret. Love the fact that you get bikini halter tops with more support for the girls!

3) Anything floral pattern, especially some of the cute sundresses that have come out this year. Sometimes I feel like I can’t pull off the pattern dress thing, but this summer I decided to take some chances. I am loving all the bright colored patterns too, especially since I am totally one of those people who will always choose the “safe” black or grey piece opposed to the bright colors!

What are your “must haves” this summer?


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Guilt is a cognitive or an emotional experience that occurs when a person realizes or believes—accurately or not—that he or she has committed an offense, wrong, etc. It is an affective state in which one experiences conflict at having done something that one believes one should not have done (or conversely, having not done something one believes one should have done).

As I touched upon yesterday in my post, I am a person that has suffers from “non” exercise guilt. Imagine my surprise when Guiltless posted on a similar topic last night. (For those who have not checked out Guiltless — Do it. You won’t be disappointed)

For me, it isn’t so much exercise guilt as it is NON exercise guilt. I don’t feel like I need to work off calories or earn my dinner. Instead, I find myself feeling lazy and therefore – guilty, when I don’t workout or exercise. I am a believer in “active rest days” so when a day comes that I have done nothing active, I get down on myself and end up feeling guilty about feeling the way I do. In the past, there have even been days where I have given a certain choice of food a second thought, due to the fact that I had been lazy and not exercised on that particular day. Albeit, these feelings haven’t caused me to change my choice as of late, but was definitely more of an issue while I was actively trying to lose weight. During my weight loss days, I would feel that not exercising would “undo” my work for that day. I also was very ill-informed and now look back at the disordered thinking I had with amazement (and not the good kind)

Although, I can say today that as every day passes I become more informed and more “in tune” with my feelings as well as my body. As far as my exercise “non” guilt is concerned, I feel that as long as I continue to make strides in recognizing this harmful way of thinking and feeling, I believe one day I will overcome these feelings completely.

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As I had said in one of my very first posts, my weight loss battle was and still is something that I don’t know how to quite to classify and explain. I have said in the past that I had tried every diet out there and my weight loss was definitely not done in the healthy, recommended way the majority of the time. I have made two very important realizations regarding this aspect of my life since embracing a healthy lifestyle:

1) Recognizing disordered thinking (regarding weight loss, body image etc) can lead to an opportunity to fix such thinking.

2) The more informed I become about healthy living, the more I want to live a healthy life.

¤  Mentally ¤ Emotionally ¤ Physically ¤

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

I realize this post is quite jumbled and all over the place, and I apologize. I felt just “off” today and have no idea what the dealio is. I go from cold to hot in a flash. I get that feeling where I just want to crawl out of my body and have a rental for a few hours. One thing that may be attributing to me feeling like poo is lack of sleep. It really is becoming a pain in the ass butt. Last night, I tried a new to me product called SleepMD:

Holy Nightmares. I am talking the type of gory nightmares that would make an excellent horror movie (like The Hills Have Eyes, and The Hostel) My panic and fear woke me up at 3 different points from 1:00 am – 5:30 am and then I tried falling back to sleep at 5:30 but couldn’t. So needless to say, I think it is safe to say that the 10 bucks I spent on this product goes in the loss column.

Such is life! Now, my bed is calling… let’s hope it is my name that it is calling! Here’s to a good nights sleep…


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I would totally start this post out by saying “Happy Monday” but I don’t feel like. Do you ever have those days where you wake up with a headache and it just doesn’t go away? Well, that was me today. However, looking at my to do list, I realized I needed to suck it up. And so today began…

After popping an Aleve, I headed for the gym for a cardio workout. I actually considered skipping it; however I will be honest here: I totally suffer from non-workout guilt. I know, I know. (more on this tomorrow) Moving on. Despite my headache, I actually got a decent workout in surprisingly. Probably because I had the TV to distract me; at least that’s what I am going with. After my workout, I headed home and got ready to tackle the few things I had on the agenda today. First up: WALLY WORLD aka  WALMART!

As Urban Dictionary.Com said: 1) Nickname for Wal-Mart that is used for over-zealous shoppers who just can’t get enough of the store you can buy guns, knives, toys and groceries at but can’t buy white-out unless you’re over 18 and have an I.D. 2) Slang for Wal*Mart.

I choose... BOTH.

Anyways, I am pretty sure I was in Walmart, oh for about… I dunno, like 2 freakin hours! I just kept getting caught up looking at this and looking at that. Although I did get what I went there for, I also got a bunch of things I didn’t need. (Seriously, how was I supposed to pass up a super cute bikini for 8 bucks!)

After my fun at Wally World, it was time to then hit up my second home The supermarket. Ugh. Right about now, my headache went from there to pounding after being in Stop & Shop for literally 3 seconds. I don’t why but I seriously think that every rude person within a 10 mile radius is at the supermarket when I am there. I was hit with not one, but two different people’s shopping cart and got not so much as a “Oh hey, sorry I just nailed with you my cart”. *mini rant over* After about 1 1/2 hour in the food store (most of that time waiting in the checkout line since there was only ONE open) I decided to forgo the list and head home. My head was just killing me.

However, I am not going to end this post on a sour note. Instead I am going to tell you about my favorite purchases of the day (and not because I think you give a hoot, but because fun purchases make me feel better.)

* 2 super cute bikinis that were only 8 bucks a piece *3 candles that smell divine  and a snazzy new water bottle (in an attempt for me to drink more H2O):

Ah, and how could I have forgot… I found my fave Gummy vitamins on SALE! (Yes, I take gummy vitamins and they are delicious!)

And, that’s how it’s gonna end…



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